News & Resources for the Adoption Constellation in June
Published almost 2 years ago • 16 min read
Trigger Warning: Father's Day
Father's Day is often harder than Mother's Day in my house. Not only is it a reminder of all the feelings towards his Samoan father (from grief to anger), but it is also a reminder that there isn't an American dad for my son either. For some children I know who have negative feelings toward their first mother, it is helpful most of the time for there not to be an adoptive mother in their home; other children will feel like they missed out twice. All days as a parent are days focused on helping our kids regulate and process as needed, but Father's Day is one where I can plan ahead and mediate the harder parts of the day. This year I am again thinking about swimming (tactile, vestibular, and proprioceptive input) and ice cream rather than the nature walk, but as always, I will follow his lead... read more on this in my instagram post from 2021
Shout out to all the single foster/adoptive moms who didn't celebrate Mother's Day and hustled extra that day and today too to support grief and the... read more on Instagram
Juneteenth
Juneteenth celebrates the day (June 19, 1865) that the last enslaved people in the US were finally notified that they had been freed by the Emancipation Proclamation (signed January 1, 1863). While it has been celebrated in the Black American community since 1866, it only became an official US holiday in 2021. Texas was the first state to make it a holiday in 1979. Black American children being raised in white families may miss out on important cultural knowledge and experiences unless their families make the effort to learn about Juneteenth and find opportunities for them to share in celebrations. As we support our clients and families, it is helpful if we are learning and sharing information.
No matter your personal feelings, opinions, or politics, unconditional positive regard is a foundational part of therapy. For therapists working with foster care and adoption, Pride is important because a 2019 study (Baams et. al.) found 30.4 percent of youth in foster care identify as LGBTQ and 5 percent as transgender, compared to 11.2 percent and 1.17 percent of youth not in foster care. They also reported higher incidences of fights in school, victimization, and mental health problems. "Research suggests that among LGBTQ youth, only one-third experience parental acceptance, with an additional one-third experiencing parental rejection, and the final one-third not disclosing their LGBTQ identity until they are adults (Katz-Wise et al., 2015). Another study found that LGB young adults who report high levels of parental rejection are eight times more likely to report attempting suicide and six times more likely to report high levels of depression (Ryan et al., 2009)" (thetrevorproject). The best suicide prevention is support, but some parents and caregivers will need your guidance on support. Remember if this isn't your specialty, it is helpful to consult with colleagues who do specialize in this area. Some additional resources:
Found In Korea 한국에서 발견된 is an award-winning 74-minute documentary film by adopted person Meggin Nam Holtz about adoption, birth search, country of origin travel, and identity. The film is youth with reading abilities friendly (subtitles used) and was created to serve as a conversation-opener for discussions about adoption. $15 suggested donation All proceeds will be directed to our host, On Your Feet Foundation, which provides the necessary support and services post-placement birthparents deserve, in order to heal and thrive.
I was asked to be the conference committee chair this year as part of my responsibilities as a board member for Adoption Knowledge Affiliates. I hope you will consider joining us, submitting a proposal, and/or sponsoring the conference.
CUB is seeking video submissions from birth mothers
What would have informed consent meant to you?
What if you knew then what you know now about adoption? What if you had been told how adoption would affect your life? What risks or outcomes would you like to make other women considering adoption aware of?
For many of us, knowing the truth about what we would experience would have led us to make a different choice.
We would love to hear what you have to say and we’d love to share it on our social media platforms.Your answer is what’s true for you, so you can’t get this wrong.
Make a video to share what informed consent would have meant to you.
Videos should be 30-90 seconds long answering the question what would have informed consent meant to you?
If you’ve got a lot to say, make multiple videos with multiple answers! We really want to share as many stories as we can to get the word out that adoption isn’t what many of us were led to believe it is.
A few technical details:
Keep videos short and sweet (30 to 90 seconds long)
Record in the daytime/ daylight with minimal background noise
We will add captions and upload to CUB’s Instagram and TikTok
Attach your video using whatever means you use to send large files (WeTransfer, Googledrive, etc.)
Let us know in the body of the email whether you want your name and links to your own social media associated with the video or whether you'd like to remain nameless.
By sending us a video with that subject line Post my video!, we understand you to approve of our posting it, but we will of course take it down if you later decide otherwise.
I want to highlight a book with each newsletter, so we can all continue to grow and learn. AD
Mirrors Made of Ink is a book of poetry by my new friend Shannon Quist. Shannon and I both serve on the board for Adoption Knowledge Affiliates. Through these poems, Shannon shares her thoughts and experiences as an adoptee as a child, an adult, a mother, and a daughter in reunion. She shares powerful imagery that is vulnerable and thought provoking. I think this is an important addition to adoptee literature which may speak to some more strongly than memoirs or fiction.
From Amazon: A collection of sixty poems spanning moments across a lifetime, Mirrors Made of Ink focuses on the emotional catastrophe of adoption. Quist muses with varied style on family, existence, and the liminal space between two lives in pieces that narrate a lonely path of discovery amidst a world seemingly made of secrets.
For more recommendations, check out my (affiliate) Amazon Storefront
Seeking Research Participants
Preliminary Exploration into Adoption Reunions
Using the Preliminary Exploration into Adoption Reunions Survey, our goal is to gather information regarding such adoption reunion topics as; how and if individuals prepare for being in reunion, how individuals respond to being in reunion, how reunions are enabled, and topics related to transnational or transracial adoptees, etc.
Racial and Ethnic Identity Development Process in Transracial Adoptees
This is a research study that looks into understanding the racial and ethnic identity development process in transracial adoptees (TRA). This study is being conducted by Banujah Koelmeyer, a second-year counseling psychology doctoral student at Northwest University. To qualify for participation, you must be an adult age 21 or older. Completion of this study typically takes approximately 30-45 minutes and is strictly confidential. I would like to videotape the interviews on a HIPAA-compliant Zoom service. Your responses will be treated confidentially and will not be linked to any identifying information about you. For more information visit: https://northwestupsych.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_1Y2c2ijIQhSlppc
Transracial Adoptees needed for study on Racial Identity Development and Mental Health
The purpose of this study is to learn more about the experiences of adult transracial adoptees living in the U.S. In particular, this survey explores if and how transracial adoption impacts racial identity development and mental heath for adult transracial adoptees. You are being asked to participate in this survey because you self-identify as an adult transracial adoptee over the age of 18. This survey includes general demographic questions (age, sexual/gender identity, religion etc.) and questions about mental heath (including past experiences of abuse, self-harm and suicidality). It also includes questions about white adoptive family, and experiences related to racial identity and racism across your lifespan. This survey is 85 questions and will take you about 25 minutes to complete. The survey is voluntary, you can exit the survey at any time, and you will remain anonymous unless you choose to provide identifying information at the end of the survey.
Adoptees of Color raised in Jewish Families
This study is designed to explore the lived experiences of adoptees of color who were raised by white parents (transracial adoptees) in predominantly Jewish families. Here are a few reasons David has created this study:
Very little is known about the experiences of adoptees within Judaism
Share your voice, create new knowledge, and help build more inclusive Jewish communities!
Goldberg, A. E., Silvert, L., & Farr, R. H. (2024). Family-building desires among adopted adolescents with lesbian, gay, and heterosexual parents. Family Relations, 1–23. https://doi.org/10.1111/fare.13042 (full text)
ABSTRACT
Objective
This study qualitatively examined family-building desires of diverse adopted adolescents.
Background: Research on parenting aspirations has rarely included youth with LGBTQ+ parents and/or from adoptive families. Understanding diverse adopted adolescents' feelings about parenthood may yield insights regarding identity and ideas about family.
Methods: We conducted a thematic analysis of interview data from 48 adopted adolescents (27 were LGBTQ+) in the United States, aged 13 to 18, from lesbian, gay, and heterosexual two-parent families.
Results: Most adolescents desired future parenthood, after achieving other normative milestones, and they typically did not feel familial or societal pressure to become parents. LGBTQ+ participants showed a preference for adoption while transracially adopted adolescents preferred biological parenthood.
Conclusion: Guided by developmental approaches about identity and adoption, as well as queer family theory, we found that teenagers adopted by lesbian, gay, and heterosexual couples generally envisioned parenthood for themselves. Plans to do so varied by minoritized gender, sexual, and racial/ethnic identities. Thus, an intersectional perspective is imperative to understand youths' thoughts about family building.
Implications: Our findings reveal insights into adopted adolescents' constructed future identities. Practitioners' understanding of adopted adolescents' development and future planning may be enhanced when adolescents' perspectives are considered.
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Toland, A. M. (2024). Down the Rabbit Hole: The Mental Health Implications of Adoption Trauma on People Adopted at Birth. Reflections: Narratives of Professional Helping, 30(2), 88–103. Retrieved from https://reflectionsnarrativesofprofessionalhelping.org/index.php/Reflections/article/view/2054 (full text)
ABSTRACT
The mental health impact of adoption on people adopted at birth has been largely neglected in social work research and literature. Authored from my perspective as a clinical social worker experiencing reunion with my birth family, seeking guidance, and coming up empty, I explore the relationship between adoption, trauma, and mental health, challenging the perception that adoption is singularly and only good. I propose a framework, the Adoption Trauma Spectrum, from which mental health professionals and adoptees can better understand adoption trauma. This framework suggests adoption trauma may occur across the spectrum of human development, potentially affecting bonding, individuation, and relationship and attachment styles. This paper emphasizes the need for more research on the impact of adoption trauma on people adopted at birth and identifies implications for future research on adoption related issues such as the psychosocial impact of at-home DNA testing on adoptees, first families, and adoptive families.
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Gulraiz, H., Anjum, R., Malik, N., Asmatullah, & Khan, A. (2022). A comparative study of the relationship between marital adjustment and life satisfaction among childless couples with or without an adopted child. Journal of Applied Research and Multidisciplinary Studies, 3(2), 00-00. https://doi.org/10.32350/jarms.32.03 (full text)
ABSTRACT
The current study explores the comparison between marital adjustment and life satisfaction among infertile/childless couples with or without an adopted child through comparative study. It is hypothesized that both groups will be different on both marital adjustment and life satisfaction. Purposive sampling technique is employed to recruit a sample which accounted for 50 couples, out of which (n = 25 infertile couples with adopted child and n = 25 infertile couples without adopted child) are selected from Fatima memorial hospital Lahore and Daar-ul-usmania adoption center, Lahore. Participants are required to fill self-made demographic form, to attempt marital adjustment test (Locke & Wallace, 1959), and Ryff psychological wellbeing scale is selected to collect data (Ryff & Keyes, 1995). Descriptive analysis of data and independent sample t test were carried out to test the proposed hypotheses. Results revealed a significant difference on marital adjustment and life satisfaction between infertile couples with adopted child and without adopted child. The findings of the current study also showed insignificant gender differences in marital adjustment and life satisfaction of infertile couples with and without an adopted child.
This family-oriented camp experience is open to all Ethiopians, Ethiopian-Americans, And Ethiopian Adoptive Families and friends, to share a taste of the traditions from the horn of Africa and come together to celebrate families in all shapes and sizes.
Camp To Belong (CTB) reunites brothers and sisters who have become separated by the foster care system through a week of camp in the summer and other events throughout the year. CTB believes that all youth deserve the opportunity to spend meaningful time with their brothers and sisters.
Camp to Belong has camps in various locations, so seek it in in your state or country.
Dr. Abby Hasberry and I are looking forward to another opportunity for our Intro (because you never fully arrive) to Adoption Competency training. We believe all therapists are working with the adoption constellation and we all have more to learn. Discounts are available for provisionally licensed professionals, students, as well as an access and inclusion rate. We want all who want to attend this training to be able to because the adoption constellation deserves access to more therapists with more knowledge and understanding. For us, practicing excellence includes ongoing learning. You can sign up now with early bird pricing.
This training will include:
adoption competency information,
working with all members of the adoption constellation & those impacted by foster care,
working with children, adults, & families,
special populations within the adoption population,
racism in adoption & foster care,
conceptualization, diagnosis, goals, and modalities for adoption therapy
research, history, and more
14 CE hours have been approved through academic sponsorship by the University of Georgia School of Social Work as required by Rule 135-B under the Georgia Composite Board of Professional Counselors, Social Workers, and Marriage and Family Therapists, and are included in the registration rate.
A third optional day is available for Brainspotting trained therapists on Setting Up Brainspotting with the Adoption Constellation, with an additional 7 CEs. This specialty training was approved by Dr. David Grand. Sign up for all three days here
I love doing in-person trainings because it offers such a rich experiences, but I was asked to offer a virtual Brainspotting Phase 1 training, which I will be offering in September. Early bird registration is available through the end of May. If you haven't yet trained in Brainspotting, I would love to have you there!
